Jokes

[heavyhorse]

12 hours ago, Ramseys said:




<a class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image" data-fileid="3463" href="https://zoowg.org/uploads/monthly_2018_05/9eL1RBq.jpg.8cbbed0821fc1a21b3410469bf50be37.jpg"></a>

Evolution continues . . . . 

[threelegs]

9 hours ago, heavyhorse said:




Evolution continues . . . . 

... and although I've never seen one of those, I'm guessing that evolution will have to continue without any contribution from the individual that tool gets used on ...




Am I right?

[Ramseys]

3 hours ago, threelegs said:




Am I right?

Yes, it's called a 'Band Castrator'. 

[heavyhorse]

6 hours ago, threelegs said:




... and although I've never seen one of those, I'm guessing that evolution will have to continue without any contribution from the individual that tool gets used on ...




Am I right?

That's my point.  Folks from the shallow enough end of the gene pool to try this Challenge will have their DNA deleted from the species.  Like the Ram that got "de-selected" for head-butting me one too many times.  He lost his "contribution".  




After 7-some generations, I now have a herd of sheep that settle their issues by shoulder-shoving instead of head-butting.  Evolution.




 




The tool is also used for docking tails of wooly sheep lambs, and repairing rectal prolapse in pigs.   

[zemlya]

A poor Russian peasant wanted to marry the daughter of a wealthy merchant, and the merchant said he could as long as he could pass a test to prove he would be a worthy husband.  The poor peasant agreed and inquired about the test, and the merchant gave him three tasks to complete by sundown.  They were:




1. Drink an entire bottle of vodka

2. Wrestle a bear to the ground

3. Prove his manhood by fucking the woman's mother




The man begins by finishing off the bottle of vodka and then he heads over to a nearby bear cave where thumping, rustling, and occasionally a cry or a growl is heard.  He exits the bear cave scratched up but victorious, and full of adrenaline he nearly yells, "Man, that was exhilarating.  Bring on that old hag you want me to fight."

[heavyhorse]

5 hours ago, zemlya said:




A poor Russian peasant wanted to marry the daughter of a wealthy merchant, and the merchant said he could as long as he could pass a test to prove he would be a worthy husband.  The poor peasant agreed and inquired about the test, and the merchant gave him three tasks to complete by sundown.  They were:




1. Drink an entire bottle of vodka

2. Wrestle a bear to the ground

3. Prove his manhood by fucking the woman's mother




The man begins by finishing off the bottle of vodka and then he heads over to a nearby bear cave where thumping, rustling, and occasionally a cry or a growl is heard.  He exits the bear cave scratched up but victorious, and full of adrenaline he nearly yells, "Man, that was exhilarating.  Bring on that old hag you want me to fight."

Tha-aa-t's gonna leave a mark.....

[Kuvaszfucker]

 A breeder brings a kuvasz bitch in to be checked for congenital megacolon and is surprised by what he sees in the vets office.




Man:  I know what the J-lube is for, I know what the higginsons pump is for and I know what the gloves are for, but doc, what's the beer for?




Vet:  Damn it nurse I said a Butt-Light not a Bud-Light.

[cabron45]

On 18/05/2018 at 4:30 PM, threelegs said:




... and although I've never seen one of those, I'm guessing that evolution will have to continue without any contribution from the individual that tool gets used on ...




Am I right?

 I have one of those for kids and lambs.

 But the rings I have are green.

[cabron45]

On 18/05/2018 at 10:57 PM, heavyhorse said:




That's my point.  Folks from the shallow enough end of the gene pool to try this Challenge will have their DNA deleted from the species.  Like the Ram that got "de-selected" for head-butting me one too many times.  He lost his "contribution".  




After 7-some generations, I now have a herd of sheep that settle their issues by shoulder-shoving instead of head-butting.  Evolution.




 




The tool is also used for docking tails of wooly sheep lambs, and repairing rectal prolapse in pigs.   

 My sheep don't need their tails docked.

 they stay clean, especially compared to some Woolies.

[heavyhorse]

4 hours ago, cabron45 said:




 My sheep don't need their tails docked.

 they stay clean, especially compared to some Woolies.

Hair sheep breeds.   Don't need docking, among other benefits.    




American wool has no market value, too many poly fibers from hay strings/nets mixed in, all the wool is Merino from Aus and NZ these days.  Woolies are fading into the past.....