I've been going up and down emotionally over the past few months over PACT and the 2000s-2010s recriminalization wave in general in the US. I keep alternating between periods of despair, anger, and serious misanthropy, periods of feeling like my emotions are invalid or illegitimate, and periods of feeling determined and confident in spite of everything. Sure enough, though, the latter always end up way too transient and short-lived.
How do you all personally deal with the lows, the feeling of weakness that comes with social and cultural adversity like this? I feel so strongly like I want to fight back, but I know that I cannot and should not, and that feeling is awful. I keep finding myself drawn, in some kind of masochistic way, to reading comments and all the support for everything that has been done to spite us, in spite of us. I know that I should stop and just let it go, but my brain seems to be a serious glutton for punishment. I don't know.
I guess this is half to vent and half to seek advice from folks who have been in the trenches for a long time. I desperately want an enduring spirit of strength and peace in my life regarding my sexuality. Is there a path that truly leads there?
I keep fantasizing about a self-sufficient farm in the middle of nowhere, with acres of pasture, a herd of horses, and no one around for many miles...just "giving up" and ditching human civilization as much as I can...
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7 hours ago, Equilibera said:
I keep fantasizing about a self-sufficient farm in the middle of nowhere, with acres of pasture, a herd of horses, and no one around for many miles...
You have it right there.....its what we all live for I feel. Some of us are lucky enough to have it, others take what we can find and enjoy what we have, when and if we have it.
I know that we will likely never be accepted in my lifetime and the law is currently anti Zoo and will stay that way for some time. I take some level of comfort in that fact that we are marginalized to a large degree, that we are not actively hunted or looked for as a rule, so we may continue to enjoy what we have if we practice it with caution and secrecy. I enjoy what I have and who I have it with, remaining under the radar as far as possible and looking to groups like: (Admin, please remove link if inappropriate)
https://www.zeta-verein.de/en/
Watching them and how they promote Zoo topics and issues in a positive light is very encouraging. Especially for those of us in Europe. There are still countries and states who do not see it as illegal.
Take heart in what we do have, in what we are, I would not change being Zoo for the world, and who we share it with, both here on the forum and in person, fellow Zoo's and Zoo friendly partners, friends etc.
I would rather be Zoo and have all the obstacles and problems we do have than be non Zoo and never face any of these problems.
Just my humble opinion...
First you have to come to terms with what's right for you. If you're full of self-doubt you need to clear that up in your own mind. I'm afraid no one can data-mine your brain, you alone have to decide.
When you are comfortable with yourself, get over the idea of social and cultural conformity being something you strive for. The world is made up of individuals. Some "different" enough that they stand in front of tanks rather than conform. Now don't get me wrong; activism is not the way to go with this, it only puts you in the crosshairs of normies. Your private life is private, keep it to yourself (and a few audiences like this board). But seriously; what "social and cultural" norm includes straight normies making a public spectacle of hetero sex? Keep it to yourself like any normal person does with their "private" activities. How stressed and bent would you be if you were normie and kept your intimate details private? OK, no difference. You seriously need to work on not giving a fat rat's buttcheeks about what other people would think about what they don't even know.
And yeah, work in small ways toward that remote farm somewhere. Not go out and sell the house and run for the woods, but each little decision in your life can take you a bit closer to your goal. What you do, where you work, where your income goes. Hell, drive a 30 year old truck; what else do you suppose you could do with 30 years worth of car payments? And car insurance payments? (I pay $190 every 6 months for car insurance. Including collision and comprehensive.) Priorities, man!
06-10-2019, 07:32 PM
(This post was last modified: 06-10-2019, 07:33 PM by silverwolf1.)
A lot of what HH said, especially this, "
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6 hours ago, heavyhorse said:
what "social and cultural" norm includes straight normies making a public spectacle of hetero sex? Keep it to yourself like any normal person does with their "private" activities.
Something I've been saying to a deaf crowd for decades.
Also,
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6 hours ago, heavyhorse said:
each little decision in your life can take you a bit closer to your goal. What you do, where you work, where your income goes.
Many folks think I have it all, a remote farm like you wish for and was born into raising and training horses and other stock. I've had to start over, from absolute scratch, 3 times now and the above is just how I've done so. Every thought with the end goal in mind, with only my animal companions taking priority over that.
You are more important than "social acceptance" of some sexual orientation or other. Work on yourself and your self first. That is where I started. I then discovered I didn't need the other.
sw
Craving social acceptance is to some degree a human quality. It is natural.
It is also a bad idea that is best repressed. Zoophilia and it really don't mix.
Thanks all for your insights.
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12 hours ago, Oregon said:
There are still countries and states who do not see it as illegal.
Take heart in what we do have, in what we are, I would not change being Zoo for the world, and who we share it with, both here on the forum and in person, fellow Zoo's and Zoo friendly partners, friends etc.
I would rather be Zoo and have all the obstacles and problems we do have than be non Zoo and never face any of these problems.
That's true, and I feel similarly. Being zoo has done much more for me in a positive way than a negative way. There are some zoo-friendly people around, and as long as places like this don't keep disappearing forever, there will always be. I suppose one ray of light in it all is the German amendment to their ban in 2013...I guess it's proof that some folks maybe have some sense after all.
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10 hours ago, heavyhorse said:
First you have to come to terms with what's right for you. If you're full of self-doubt you need to clear that up in your own mind. I'm afraid no one can data-mine your brain, you alone have to decide.
I wouldn't say I'm totally consumed with self-doubt, thankfully. I had a long phase of that in my teens, and I think it has since mostly righted itself in young adulthood. My negativity can be characterized better, I think, more as this sense of seeing a lot wrong with the world around me and being seriously pessimistic about my role in it. Sort of a lack of faith in things' ability to improve...to the point where I loop right back around and start thinking I'm out of my mind for wanting such a thing to happen at all.
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10 hours ago, heavyhorse said:
You seriously need to work on not giving a fat rat's buttcheeks about what other people would think about what they don't even know.
You're seriously right about that. Strategically not giving a fuck. Something to strive for...I guess I ought to go read more Camus.
And, to be clear: I'm not interested in being public. That's about the last thing on my modern to-do list, and something instead for the transhumanist biopunk robofuture that will happen 300 years after I'm dead. I'm just interested in feeling less marginalized, less stressed, more at peace with the world while I'm living in it.
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10 hours ago, heavyhorse said:
And yeah, work in small ways toward that remote farm somewhere. Not go out and sell the house and run for the woods, but each little decision in your life can take you a bit closer to your goal. What you do, where you work, where your income goes. Hell, drive a 30 year old truck; what else do you suppose you could do with 30 years worth of car payments? And car insurance payments? (I pay $190 every 6 months for car insurance. Including collision and comprehensive.) Priorities, man!
This is great advice for everyone, I think, not just zoos looking to own country property. : P I try to be as cognizant as I can of the slow-drip money sinks in life. Learning and getting better at it, I hope.
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4 hours ago, silverwolf1 said:
You are more important than "social acceptance" of some sexual orientation or other. Work on yourself and your self first. That is where I started. I then discovered I didn't need the other.
Thanks SW for the encouragement, and for your commitment and perseverance in life. I'm giving it my best...just trying to smooth out the bumps along the way.
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1 hour ago, cervids said:
Craving social acceptance is to some degree a human quality. It is natural.
It is also a bad idea that is best repressed. Zoophilia and it really don't mix.
I'm well aware, sadly. It is a natural tendency that sometimes, like in this case, does more harm than good.
maybe i am simply form a different generation, or simply don't worry
i accepted who and what i am a long time ago, like above made sacrifices in the areas it didn't matter as much to me as my companions did, don't need fancy cars boats jewelry the newest video game console and expensive games to make me happy.... my companions do ... i put them first above other things so they make me happy
as stated above by others ... i don't discuss my normal hetro sex life with anyone but my partner .. never had a need to discuss my animal sex life with anyone either .. it's my private life. I have always been fine discussing things of an animal nature with just zoo's.
All the repression and laws don't really bother me because they don't effect me or my loved ones. I have no desires to have my sexual preferences validated by anyone. Never had a desire to be out of the closet.
Don't do anything in public to get caught for and no one will ever know what you do in your bedroom or barn
I have also never felt like i was hiding any part of my life from the rest of the world really ... i don't even discuss my (normal) sexual proclivities with anyone either and i don't want to hear theirs
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21 hours ago, Equilibera said:
How do you all personally deal with the lows, the feeling of weakness that comes with social and cultural adversity like this?
I don't feel them.
Ask yourself HOW these things truly effect you and why should they?
If you do not have your own companion then work to achieve that goal.
If you are trespassing and worrying about getting caught and prosecuted.... don't ... you are far more likely to get shot, captured and beaten or some such then arrested for abusing someones animals.
I used to be very public and visible, under a different screen name. I made a lot of posts and had a few pages on Tumblr, Deviantart, Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, etc. I even made a zoo pride sign and got photographed with me carrying the sign at the pride parade a few years ago.
I thought I could steer through it by myself, and I was wrong. Someone tried to doxx, told my family about me and that kind of woke me up to what I was dealing with. I was also younger, and naive about a lot of things in the world at that time. You will find you aren't so bold when the threat of losing everything you care about becomes real.
There are a select few friends who know about me, but after I revealed myself to them, I didn't want to run the risk further. I am becoming more visible as a person in meatspace (yay for gaining social skills I guess?), and I don't even plan on having a live-in monogamous relationship, so I have no real need to tell anyone anymore. I know there are probably some friends who would rebuke me from their lives in a hot second if they ever were to know, but I think they are few and far in between, the people I hang out with are extremely open to sexuality and weirdness in general. If it slips out to someone, and someone brings it up, I just plan on saying that I don't want to talk about it. It avoids being disloyal and untrustworthy without making yourself vulnerable, for all anyone knows I could have been forced into it, or forced to get a very visible zeta tattoo by a sadistic sexually crazed ex, I'll let people think what they want to think. People tend to be less violent about extremely controversial aspects if they don't know for certain, or they have any doubts that you even have them in the first place, it's just better to not give anyone anything to go on, at all if you value your life and freedom and that of your animals.
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On 6/9/2019 at 10:39 PM, Equilibera said:
I keep fantasizing about a self-sufficient farm in the middle of nowhere, with acres of pasture, a herd of horses, and no one around for many miles...just "giving up" and ditching human civilization as much as I can...
I've thought about having a life like that... only I dont have experience with horses, so mine may just be a pack of dogs.
If only getting acceptance without people going into full on lash out mode would be possible. But sadly, not so much of course.
Over the years in my experience, I've learned to keep as much of me in hiding as possible.. I was a dumbass when I was younger, such as a video clip on a USB drive when someone took it, and other things such as almost getting caught with a dog (luckily my bedroom door was faced the other way and my dog was quick getting out of her position).
I feel like this next one is relevant. Being careful who you have as a roommate. Even if they're zoo. It seems I can never get a roommate who is decent. Yet, this guy seems to think he can have stuff on me... but... his content is on those encrypted drives. But he claims hes a hacker. Yep... a full on hacker... I think he forgot searching youtube videos dont count. Like anyone is going to believe a lazy, jobless person who claims he has degrees in every subject in college.
What's funny is he keeps wanting to contact me, but it's only so he can turn things around and say it was my fault hes the way he is.
So that went into a long rant. Sorry.. but it's not like I'm worried about him coming on here.. YouTube doesn't bring up writers guild. Lol
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